Eskort18.net sounds more like escorts are for the 18 year olds and above. Well, yeah up until you are legal, you could employ the services of a jerk off cream and your right hand. But then, you’ll have to man up when you’re legal, relieve your right hand, and go bed some escorts. So, an Eskort18 review is what I’ll be dishing out today just so you don’t masturbate till your meaty is half fried by the friction from your hands. Come cum to this.
Shitty Home To Sexy Snatches
Now, there’s so much escort sites like this lack and it’s pretty obvious from the homepage. To begin with, a poor design is a turn off for any normal 21st century boner. I mean even if you’re growing mushrooms in your dick bush, the Eskort18 homepage won’t still make sense. The Eskort18 homepage is archaic (site looks like it was put together by a starved boner owner). The background color here is white and there are patches of pink adding to the overall color theme. There is a Search bar at the top of the page and a row of buttons that include the home, place an ad, escort girls, escort guys, trans escorts, new ads, find a location, and advertising buttons. The remainder of the homepage here just contains amateur looking cunts running to the bottom of the page.
Your boners don’t speak a language different from what your brain can comprehend, and well, if your hard-ons don’t come with superpowers like comprehending any language tagged to escort tits and cunts, then you’d want to stick to perusing this site with the help of a translator if you’re not Swedish or at least able to comprehend this language.
Well, so much for a site that replaces k for c in the spelling of escort as though it would be more pronounced and good looking in pimping escorts’ asses to horny penises. The good thing about such amateur looking sites like this is that they are generally very easy to navigate. And why shouldn’t a shitty and half naked site not be easy to navigate? The Eskort18 homepage is quite easy to navigate but terrible.
Naked Babes Naked Profiles
To begin withWell, what’s really the difference between sexting and suffocating your hard penile shaft with a jerk off lotion smeared on your right palm? It’s fucken one and the same thing! Sexting and watching porn aren’t really any different, you just pay for one and could get it live, while you have an eternity of dick pounding pussy archives available on the other to choose which best gives you a persistent hard on per time. Well, why have I said this? Eskort18 is majorly an archive of sexting escorts. That’s quite crazy if you’d ask me.
I don’t get why I’d strap my boner around my waistline and head up an escort site only to go get live porn. I mean I could just hit the URL of any of the thousands of porn sites on the net and grab on to my penis for as long as my sperm cells keep racing to the orgasm finish line. This’d save me the stress of having to masturbate to a bitchy cunt rubbing on her breast instead of my chest, eating a dildo instead of my dick and teasing the shit out of my already horny brain. But the largest portion of the few escort ads here have escort babes whose services are just centered about making dicks harder than they already are over the phone.
There are lots of babes up for cam shows available here and this might be just what you’d prefer (especially if your wife probably tags along with you like a huntress to everywhere apart from when you’re on your device and alone in the restroom) it’s just not appealing to come to an escort site where almost every babe wants to lazily spread their twats over the internet and have no dick plow them.
The escorts here are amateur looking with tits that sag from their bras and asses that have grown jiggly from sitting at home. And so, if an escort turns up with an unshaven cunt and tits that get to her feet at your apartment from this escort site, then getting surprised is one of the things you should not do. The escort profile pages here are scanty and have almost no information at all. Well, I had expected this since pretty much everything on this site looks like it was put together by a lazy bunch of cunts and dicks.
On The Go For More Than Hard Penises
Your dick doesn’t spit gold or silver to say the least and although the babes here are as lazy as ships in the doldrums, they have going rates too and some are careful to state this in their near naked profile pages.
So there’s the 22 year old sexy blonde who goes by the name Annite. Annite’s services include sex with or without a condom. She charges 300 Kr/ 29 USD for 30 minutes and 600 Kr/ 58 USD for 1 hour.
Elisabeth is an 18 year old big assed beauty with alluring curves and a sexy build like a mermaid. Elisabeth’s rate is set at 5000 Kr/ 480 USD for 1 hour. Crazy rates!
What I Think
This site is a shit hole and very shabbily built. Your serious desire for a steamy fuck will most likely be dashed to the ground here. There’s nothing interesting going on here beside brothels pimping their hoochies behind fake escort profiles. Hang on to your boners for the dear life of fuck and head over to some other escort site.